I thought David Copperfield was one of the only magicians that created illusions that the world believed. I just realized it’s truly the opposite. While he’s getting paid millions to make the statue of liberty disappear and walking through the Great Wall of China, the “average asshole” is making deception look like love and walking through and over hearts for the price of a woman or a man’s paycheck.
The Realm of Stupidity; a world in which those to whom are “text-book crazy” reside. A place for only them to understand the merit in their lopsided decisions and share their “track marks” with their neighbors because there’s nothing better in life for them but to be comfortable in mayhem and consistent chaos. They don’t desire change so they hesitate to be surrounded with forward movers. They group themselves together and create their own quarantine.
Shared success? If you call the completion of a downfall a rewarding experience, then please spread the word. Great minds think alike, so be choosy to whom you enlighten. I find it impossible to understand people that devalue their worth and pack their bags for this vacation. Don’t bother explaining your position to me. I’m not a junkie for pain. I quit that habit years ago. Can I point you in the direction of detox?
Careful explanations, and excuse making, should be the reason for your hesitation, when it comes to picking the place you choose to vacation. Right? If you need a lot of details to explain your choice in retail, then I suggest you re-sale that lie to another female, ‘cause I’m not buying. …Why am I rhyming?
I have to think like Dr. Suess to understand the magic. It’s a fantasy they're in, that’s what makes this world so tragic. Love doesn’t cost a thing, but there’s a price for pain, when love masquerades as abuse, it pulls away at what makes you sane.
I don’t envy a life that’s surface doesn’t reflect the fragile core it created. It may look good to the observer, but there is nothing to envy about a subconscious broken heart. Because I want something solid, I can only peer through the gates of this world in continual disbelief. “The things we do for love,” but what about the pain in our regrets? I’m going to keep walking. I know I’m headed in the right direction. Let me know if anyone needs a map, I brought copies!
© A. L. Lewis
My Mind, Your Experience!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Monday, April 28, 2008
The List: Part 3- "The Measure of a Man"
“ The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”
“Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
“Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.”
-Martin Luther King Jr.
It’s not enough to be a replica…I deserve the authentic original. I don’t want what looks like it could be great, but when it’s in my possession all I see are their unresolved “track marks”. Having half of what I want or a getting a 4th of my reflection means I’m settling for an equation that doesn’t measure up to a standard I put forth when I’m presenting myself. If I did a portion of what people expect, or a 3rd of what’s necessary of me, I’d be less likely to pull in better numbers from other people during the exchange.
I’m looking for a perfect 10, I’ll even be happy with a strong 8. I won’t settle for 5 or 6, because I don’t give anyone half when I’m putting forth 100% of my heart. So why keep battling with the opposite sex over things that we can’t agree upon or illicit actions that derive from a heart that you can’t consciously understand. No two people are ever the same, but their foundation of thought needs to measure up to your avenue. If your differences are way past the “half” mark then how will the “whole” thing pan out in the end? Destruction.
“Treat others as you would like to be treated.” -The Golden Rule. I’m assessing every person that enters my arena. It’s not enough to have intentions to do right by my heart, it’s necessary to be what’s right for me to put in my heart. Mistakes are one thing, but conscious actions with later remorse will get you one-way ticket in the other direction. Anything I do to you, I expect in return. I set out to do what’s right, yet at time’s I stumble, but you’ll never have to worry about me purposely tripping over your heart. Why should I expect less?
Don’t just be the candle, but rather the source for heat. Only a match can light a fire, but my wick doesn’t burn for everyone. I need those of you who want to be an option or a gap-filler in my life to make sure you deserve the space. What we want is not always what we’re deserving of. To evaluate an option, means you may have to evaluate yourself. If you’re not getting what you’re giving or vice versa, and you know the measurements don’t add up, you may need new choices. I’m not afraid of new “numbers”, I’ve been in a deficit for a while. I deserve a perfect 10… I think the biggest fear will come the day I finally meet him!
© A. L. Lewis
“Nothing in all the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
“Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.”
-Martin Luther King Jr.
It’s not enough to be a replica…I deserve the authentic original. I don’t want what looks like it could be great, but when it’s in my possession all I see are their unresolved “track marks”. Having half of what I want or a getting a 4th of my reflection means I’m settling for an equation that doesn’t measure up to a standard I put forth when I’m presenting myself. If I did a portion of what people expect, or a 3rd of what’s necessary of me, I’d be less likely to pull in better numbers from other people during the exchange.
I’m looking for a perfect 10, I’ll even be happy with a strong 8. I won’t settle for 5 or 6, because I don’t give anyone half when I’m putting forth 100% of my heart. So why keep battling with the opposite sex over things that we can’t agree upon or illicit actions that derive from a heart that you can’t consciously understand. No two people are ever the same, but their foundation of thought needs to measure up to your avenue. If your differences are way past the “half” mark then how will the “whole” thing pan out in the end? Destruction.
“Treat others as you would like to be treated.” -The Golden Rule. I’m assessing every person that enters my arena. It’s not enough to have intentions to do right by my heart, it’s necessary to be what’s right for me to put in my heart. Mistakes are one thing, but conscious actions with later remorse will get you one-way ticket in the other direction. Anything I do to you, I expect in return. I set out to do what’s right, yet at time’s I stumble, but you’ll never have to worry about me purposely tripping over your heart. Why should I expect less?
Don’t just be the candle, but rather the source for heat. Only a match can light a fire, but my wick doesn’t burn for everyone. I need those of you who want to be an option or a gap-filler in my life to make sure you deserve the space. What we want is not always what we’re deserving of. To evaluate an option, means you may have to evaluate yourself. If you’re not getting what you’re giving or vice versa, and you know the measurements don’t add up, you may need new choices. I’m not afraid of new “numbers”, I’ve been in a deficit for a while. I deserve a perfect 10… I think the biggest fear will come the day I finally meet him!
© A. L. Lewis
The List: Part 2- The 5 Senses
The mirror never lies, but is what you see truly what you get? Can you be certain that people have the conscious truth about you when judging you by your presentation? Doubtful.
There are more dimensions to a person than just what your eye's pick up. In our mind’s seeing is believing, but what if you lost your sight and had to rely on your other dormant abilities to lead your judgment calls. Correct perception is only granted to those who pay attention. Behind the mask lies a mind for exploring, behind the shield lies a heart held captive, with each stride denotes the intentions and with every verbal encounter relays a plan of action. In order to see things clearly you need to focus with all your senses.
My list leads me to not just denote a few adjectives on paper and do a police line-up for the “suspect” who measures up to the crime of being the one for me. I could cuff any “Average Joe”, but would I be entirely satisfied or longing for his sentence to be up? The latter of the two is the likely answer.
Seeing, Hearing, Taste, Touch and Smell. Don’t we learn about that in Kindergarten? Television show’s like “Are you Smarter than a 5th grader” remind us how complex are thinking has become as adults when something as simple as trusting our instincts and easy knowledge can possibly win you the grand prize you're looking for.
What I need is easy… I want to SEE something that is as visually satisfying to my eyes, make my heart smile with the same pleasure. I want to HEAR the words spoken to me coincide with the actions being delivered. I want to TASTE the satisfaction that comes from finally having a thirst for something, genuinely quenched. I want to not only be TOUCHED on my exterior, although hugs are nice, but I need it to eventually reach my heart and deliver that same warmth. I need a SMELL that lingers… If you’re to be the perfume of my life, you need to fill my heart, soul, and mind with an undeniable and unforgettable scent.
What I’m looking for is beyond a few words, packaging and a couple gestures. It’s an overall feeling that comes from a genuine encounter with someone who possibly mirrors your own list. You have to be a reflection of what you want in return. Because I know that type of person I am, I won’t yield to the opposite. I have to keep moving. Nothing is impossible,so I have patience.
© A. L. Lewis
There are more dimensions to a person than just what your eye's pick up. In our mind’s seeing is believing, but what if you lost your sight and had to rely on your other dormant abilities to lead your judgment calls. Correct perception is only granted to those who pay attention. Behind the mask lies a mind for exploring, behind the shield lies a heart held captive, with each stride denotes the intentions and with every verbal encounter relays a plan of action. In order to see things clearly you need to focus with all your senses.
My list leads me to not just denote a few adjectives on paper and do a police line-up for the “suspect” who measures up to the crime of being the one for me. I could cuff any “Average Joe”, but would I be entirely satisfied or longing for his sentence to be up? The latter of the two is the likely answer.
Seeing, Hearing, Taste, Touch and Smell. Don’t we learn about that in Kindergarten? Television show’s like “Are you Smarter than a 5th grader” remind us how complex are thinking has become as adults when something as simple as trusting our instincts and easy knowledge can possibly win you the grand prize you're looking for.
What I need is easy… I want to SEE something that is as visually satisfying to my eyes, make my heart smile with the same pleasure. I want to HEAR the words spoken to me coincide with the actions being delivered. I want to TASTE the satisfaction that comes from finally having a thirst for something, genuinely quenched. I want to not only be TOUCHED on my exterior, although hugs are nice, but I need it to eventually reach my heart and deliver that same warmth. I need a SMELL that lingers… If you’re to be the perfume of my life, you need to fill my heart, soul, and mind with an undeniable and unforgettable scent.
What I’m looking for is beyond a few words, packaging and a couple gestures. It’s an overall feeling that comes from a genuine encounter with someone who possibly mirrors your own list. You have to be a reflection of what you want in return. Because I know that type of person I am, I won’t yield to the opposite. I have to keep moving. Nothing is impossible,so I have patience.
© A. L. Lewis
Sunday, April 27, 2008
The List: Part 1- Recipe for Love
Aren’t lists for the grocery store? That’s what I used to think. A year ago when I was ending a bad relationship, a friend came to me and helped me discover the notion that much like picking out the ingredients to cook a great meal, you need to have a visual idea as to what you want when you are seeking your partner. Like most meals, you don’t want to side step on ingredients otherwise you don’t get the best quality of what you are fixing. If the recipe makes the meal, then the qualities of someone make the man. You could shortcut and be unsatisfied yet full, or you could take time, disallow substitutions, and prepare the best and long for seconds before continuing on with dessert.
So many of us know what we are looking for, but when presented with opportunities we relax on our preconditions and mentally burn our lists in order to satisfy our appetite at the time being. No one intentionally plans on going through drive-thru’s for the rest of their life, but if you are a person of good taste, when you know you don’t have something that’s truly satisfying to your mental palate, you will always desire an upgrade. I don’t care how many new burgers your favorite fast food joint puts out, a home cooked or a truly refined meal is the one you remember the most and appreciate when it’s presented to you. So why settle for less? Cheap and easy isn’t always the best thing for you…
As I put myself out there to get back in the relational game of life, I run across imitations, generic versions, and overpriced brands of the man I’m looking for. What happened to the old-fashioned, good ole reliable, in the nick of time, better than Lawry’s Seasoning Salt brothers that can add zest to anything you put them on. An addition you long for, and run to get as soon as you’re all out. No substitutions will do; I need a flavor that enhances, and never takes away from the taste. That’s what I’m looking for.
I’ve pulled out my list again. This time I won’t get sidetracked or relax on my ingredients. I know what I need because I know what it takes to fill my heart and soul with something worth my appetite. When you look back in your past there’s always one meal you remember the most. I’m looking for the one to repeat that satisfaction and forever leave me hunger-less.
© A. L. Lewis
So many of us know what we are looking for, but when presented with opportunities we relax on our preconditions and mentally burn our lists in order to satisfy our appetite at the time being. No one intentionally plans on going through drive-thru’s for the rest of their life, but if you are a person of good taste, when you know you don’t have something that’s truly satisfying to your mental palate, you will always desire an upgrade. I don’t care how many new burgers your favorite fast food joint puts out, a home cooked or a truly refined meal is the one you remember the most and appreciate when it’s presented to you. So why settle for less? Cheap and easy isn’t always the best thing for you…
As I put myself out there to get back in the relational game of life, I run across imitations, generic versions, and overpriced brands of the man I’m looking for. What happened to the old-fashioned, good ole reliable, in the nick of time, better than Lawry’s Seasoning Salt brothers that can add zest to anything you put them on. An addition you long for, and run to get as soon as you’re all out. No substitutions will do; I need a flavor that enhances, and never takes away from the taste. That’s what I’m looking for.
I’ve pulled out my list again. This time I won’t get sidetracked or relax on my ingredients. I know what I need because I know what it takes to fill my heart and soul with something worth my appetite. When you look back in your past there’s always one meal you remember the most. I’m looking for the one to repeat that satisfaction and forever leave me hunger-less.
© A. L. Lewis
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Track Marks
Residue… left over from a past life done and gone. The habit is broken, but it’s story remains. Ingrained to the pieces of my soul and mimicked in my every encounter. I was a junkie, but I don’t get high anymore. I had a high tolerance for pain, but a low handle on the aftermath. So many memories, laced to impair. I’ve put down my poison, but how do I rub away these track marks…
I kind of like someone… but I’ve never seen contraband like this before. Call me a square, but I’m boxed in. I’m self-involved, absorbed in my precautions, surrounded by my fear, yet desiring a new experience.
My walls are up, but there’s a fence with a key. The “Do Not Enter” sign is hanging up by one corner. As my guard drops, so does my protective barrier. All that slants will soon fall down, and all that’s dormant, will bloom again. The closer he comes, the more apt I am to want to…
Track marks… In a haste to reserve myself, and the fear of standing there, bare and open, I halt my exposure and remain. I retract my key… but it dangles further from my hand with each encounter. Patience… The fear of the unknown leaves me tucked away, but yearning. I’m “Dreaming with a broken heart”, yet hoping he’s got the glue. Not to fix my parts, only I have the power, but to stick himself to me if he discovers that I’m his addiction.
My wounds used to be deep, but are steadily rising to the surface. I have patches of hurt but they don’t cover my quilt. My confusion, paints illusions but every girl needs mystery. It’s not that hard to figure out what I desire… pay attention to what you don’t see.
© A. L. Lewis
I kind of like someone… but I’ve never seen contraband like this before. Call me a square, but I’m boxed in. I’m self-involved, absorbed in my precautions, surrounded by my fear, yet desiring a new experience.
My walls are up, but there’s a fence with a key. The “Do Not Enter” sign is hanging up by one corner. As my guard drops, so does my protective barrier. All that slants will soon fall down, and all that’s dormant, will bloom again. The closer he comes, the more apt I am to want to…
Track marks… In a haste to reserve myself, and the fear of standing there, bare and open, I halt my exposure and remain. I retract my key… but it dangles further from my hand with each encounter. Patience… The fear of the unknown leaves me tucked away, but yearning. I’m “Dreaming with a broken heart”, yet hoping he’s got the glue. Not to fix my parts, only I have the power, but to stick himself to me if he discovers that I’m his addiction.
My wounds used to be deep, but are steadily rising to the surface. I have patches of hurt but they don’t cover my quilt. My confusion, paints illusions but every girl needs mystery. It’s not that hard to figure out what I desire… pay attention to what you don’t see.
© A. L. Lewis
Monday, April 14, 2008
Seemingly Not... but Maybe.
To be undecided… but appear to be sure. A fence rider; afraid to make a choice because to choose may mean you lose it all. How I appear may not be the avenue in which I reside. I’m mobile so I know how to pace the floor. I could drive from one end of the town and back to the other, and still not be settled on which side to parallel my emotions.
So many think they know my category, but since I’m forever changing my label in your eyes should waiver daily. I know how to expand; I’m made from elastic. The only thing firm about me is the opinions I’ve stated prior, but how will my journey today, affect my thoughts of yesteryear?
My certainties lie in my decisions. My reservations rest with my additions.
In a room of expanding columns some pillars of thought always remain… I’m choosing to live. I’d hate to stay emerged in a dying world. I’ve decided to change. There’s no time better then the days you’re blessed to be woke. I’m settled on my mission. Without a plan, you’ll fall to whatever path you see. I’m exact in my choices. I don’t regret the latter day and look forward to perfecting the next. I won’t compromise on my heart. From it beats life, and I won’t die to interruption.
© A. L. Lewis
So many think they know my category, but since I’m forever changing my label in your eyes should waiver daily. I know how to expand; I’m made from elastic. The only thing firm about me is the opinions I’ve stated prior, but how will my journey today, affect my thoughts of yesteryear?
My certainties lie in my decisions. My reservations rest with my additions.
In a room of expanding columns some pillars of thought always remain… I’m choosing to live. I’d hate to stay emerged in a dying world. I’ve decided to change. There’s no time better then the days you’re blessed to be woke. I’m settled on my mission. Without a plan, you’ll fall to whatever path you see. I’m exact in my choices. I don’t regret the latter day and look forward to perfecting the next. I won’t compromise on my heart. From it beats life, and I won’t die to interruption.
© A. L. Lewis
Thursday, April 10, 2008
"Text-Book" Crazy
By Definition:
Crazy- 1. (adj.) Afflicted with or exhibiting irrationality and mental unsoundness. 2.(noun) An eccentric or mentally unbalanced person.
“text-book crazy”- the art form of mastering your delusions that can only be understood to outsiders by reading about you in a medical handbook. IOW… you need help!!!
Maybe it’s not all in a definition… but if you don’t deviate or variate from the idea then according to the laws of what’s absolute then you must be... Right? But what’s really in a word or rather a label? What makes the term transition from probability to definite? I’d hate to rest on the obvious, but if the traits exude the essentials, then my position curves towards the truth. So to simplify this equation, you either are or you aren’t in sound mind, because in reality there are no in betweens. Choose a side.
The things we do for love. Is it necessary to be broadsided by the obvious to live the American Dream? Don’t be crazy for something, when you can be sane yet have nothing. Those who can learn to be content “with-out”, will be the first to be blessed “with”. I may not have, but one day I will, and I’m sane enough to be patient for my dream to wake in my reality.
In this world you only have so many options. I’d like to see the truth for what it is and act accordingly. I stray from ignorance; there’s no real peace when you relax in a false consciousness. So many are quick to see life through kaleidoscope specs that they forget like everything in time their eyes will grow weary. I prefer to dream in black in white, yet operate in color. The only grey in my reality is the existence of you; those of you that are “text-book crazy” to whom never see the truth because their mind is content with hesitations.
We all want “that dream”, but don’t capture the nightmare in the midst of trying to will your own creation. I’d like to come home to a “guarantee” but the only thing certain is the death in my bad decisions. My choices can breed life, yet mistakes can take my breath away. I’d hate to die to ignorance, when I can live to true opportunity.
If you’re holding on to something that’s not good for you, then don’t be upset if nothing good ever happens to you. Love doesn’t have to come in pieces; but if you refuse to see the “whole” picture, then don’t be surprised when you get half of what life has to offer you.
I don’t necessarily embrace being alone, but for now I am content. I have to cultivate my wants and needs, and hope that from them grows something promising worth the pick. We’re all flowers; fertilized with the chance to grow to perfection. I’d rather wait to pick one with my likeness then settle for a wilted flower still wading in its own manure.
I’m not crazy for wanting more or choosing to wait for what’s best for me. I’d be crazy to settle for what was in front of me when I’ve already seen the destruction it left behind. Insanity paves roads to seclusions, because when you get there, you’re usually the only one who understands. Not everything in life has to makes sense, but if it’s senseless and you continue to do it then you might just be… "text-book crazy".
© A.L. Lewis
Crazy- 1. (adj.) Afflicted with or exhibiting irrationality and mental unsoundness. 2.(noun) An eccentric or mentally unbalanced person.
“text-book crazy”- the art form of mastering your delusions that can only be understood to outsiders by reading about you in a medical handbook. IOW… you need help!!!
Maybe it’s not all in a definition… but if you don’t deviate or variate from the idea then according to the laws of what’s absolute then you must be... Right? But what’s really in a word or rather a label? What makes the term transition from probability to definite? I’d hate to rest on the obvious, but if the traits exude the essentials, then my position curves towards the truth. So to simplify this equation, you either are or you aren’t in sound mind, because in reality there are no in betweens. Choose a side.
The things we do for love. Is it necessary to be broadsided by the obvious to live the American Dream? Don’t be crazy for something, when you can be sane yet have nothing. Those who can learn to be content “with-out”, will be the first to be blessed “with”. I may not have, but one day I will, and I’m sane enough to be patient for my dream to wake in my reality.
In this world you only have so many options. I’d like to see the truth for what it is and act accordingly. I stray from ignorance; there’s no real peace when you relax in a false consciousness. So many are quick to see life through kaleidoscope specs that they forget like everything in time their eyes will grow weary. I prefer to dream in black in white, yet operate in color. The only grey in my reality is the existence of you; those of you that are “text-book crazy” to whom never see the truth because their mind is content with hesitations.
We all want “that dream”, but don’t capture the nightmare in the midst of trying to will your own creation. I’d like to come home to a “guarantee” but the only thing certain is the death in my bad decisions. My choices can breed life, yet mistakes can take my breath away. I’d hate to die to ignorance, when I can live to true opportunity.
If you’re holding on to something that’s not good for you, then don’t be upset if nothing good ever happens to you. Love doesn’t have to come in pieces; but if you refuse to see the “whole” picture, then don’t be surprised when you get half of what life has to offer you.
I don’t necessarily embrace being alone, but for now I am content. I have to cultivate my wants and needs, and hope that from them grows something promising worth the pick. We’re all flowers; fertilized with the chance to grow to perfection. I’d rather wait to pick one with my likeness then settle for a wilted flower still wading in its own manure.
I’m not crazy for wanting more or choosing to wait for what’s best for me. I’d be crazy to settle for what was in front of me when I’ve already seen the destruction it left behind. Insanity paves roads to seclusions, because when you get there, you’re usually the only one who understands. Not everything in life has to makes sense, but if it’s senseless and you continue to do it then you might just be… "text-book crazy".
© A.L. Lewis
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
A Few Words...
"Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be." ~Thomas à Kempis, Imitation of Christ, c.1420
"You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice." ~Steven D. Woodhull
"Remember, if you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns!" ~Allison Gappa Bottke
"Now that it's all over, what did you really do yesterday that's worth mentioning?" ~Coleman Cox
"The first and greatest victory is to conquer yourself; to be conquered by yourself is of all things most shameful and vile." ~Plato
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
UN-Regretfully Yours,
Dear {please insert name},
How’ve you been? Me, it’s been rough, but I’m arriving. So much has changed in me from then to now. I know that change is a sign of completing life lessons. You were one learned early and I retained that baggage for my life’s diploma. Thanks.
I must be honest, at time’s I still feel mad at you. You breached our contract, but I’m not surprised. I never hired you for mental digression, I thought I gained a partner but you deviated us from that course. Even after a few suspensions, you still had to be fired. I know now you never wanted the job, or you’d have appreciated the position for the value it held.
When you met me I was a plain field of adventure, but after our departure my surface had been refaced. You definitely weren’t the same going in and out of the union, but who knew one could have the power to deaden a blooming bulb that they once desired to pick. So many gardens to trample on and you chose to interrupt the growth of my flowers. I just thank god my roots were deep enough to reproduce its beauty after my season of winter had passed.
I was never really big on Colorado, but having had you in my life created my own Rocky Mountains. I’ve been doing a lot climbing lately, but just know it’s making me stronger. As I work my way to the top, I see the defeat of my accomplishments beneath me. Although it didn’t come with ease, I appreciate it more for overcoming the battle I took to get here.
I hope all is well for you, because I’d hate to see you wading in your own destruction. I’d never wish your tornado on my worst enemy, but I wouldn’t trade the whirlwind of my experience for the world. I just know now, that I must build my house with stronger foundation, so that even the biggest storm couldn’t destroy its base.
Not much more to say from here, my words to you are a privilege, and the few I’ve just rewarded you with truly were never earned. Just stopping through to say thanks. You helped me shed my naive interior. And in truth... now I know better. I’m now more selective, and quite objective when I’m choosing my additions. Pain is not a habit I intend to repeat. Thanks for helping me grasp that truth.
UN-Regretfully Yours,
Alaina
© A.L. Lewis
Monday, April 7, 2008
Unattended Baggage
My plane is taking off and there’s no place for unattended or overweight bags. Please leave those problems at the door or take the useless contents of your past life out before setting foot in my airship. My fuselage is cracked enough do to my own past journeys, to add your dents to mine could bring about an emergency landing. No time for pit stops; my voyage has just begun.
The FAA has rules that I intend to follow. I’m working on adhering to those principals preflight. I’m smoothing out my kinks and building a sturdier engine. My passengers need a safe journey. I’d hate for them to be amidst my turbulence. You lose customers when you can’t deliver a good experience.
I don’t want my frequent fliers to always long for the "exit row". When I’m complete this will be a trip of a lifetime.
These tickets are first class only; can you afford to ride? I’ve had enough passengers that bring about problems that can make a two-hour destination an everlasting miserable experience. If you want a bigger responsibility, then that means you have a larger scale to be measured on.
So now I ask... What are you doing to merge with my airline? You have to have a 5 star personality to co-captain this ship. I’m in training to get my wings, but when it’s time to soar the skies, I need you to be ready to help anchor. I’m quite capable of doing it alone, but if I dose off... who will get the wheel?
I need someone I can trust with my life, that I know will be fit enough to coincide with this journey. The vision is my own, but if you’re headed in my direction we can cut our expenses if we choose to ride together. As inflation takes off and the prices go up, so do my expectations. You get what you pay for, and for every expensive experience it needs to be cost-effective. So the real question is... Are you worth my investment?
I can’t invest in damaged goods. You can’t gleam on the outside but have a tarnished interior when I open that door. I’d rather take a flight in a DC-10 with a few common dents, or in need of a new paint job if the soul of its engine is fine-tuned to withstand our journey. Just because you look good on the outside doesn’t mean your course is set to follow mine. I know how to deviate; I won’t follow anyone towards destruction.
Right now I’m resting in the mechanic’s hanger. Preparing myself for that journey. No fleet has to fly alone. If you think you’re equipped to enter my radar, I suggest that you be worth entering my radius. As I stated prior, this airline has no place for unattended or overweight bags. Anyone who chooses to break these rules will be immediately asked to exit the cabin. Thanks.
© A. L. Lewis
The FAA has rules that I intend to follow. I’m working on adhering to those principals preflight. I’m smoothing out my kinks and building a sturdier engine. My passengers need a safe journey. I’d hate for them to be amidst my turbulence. You lose customers when you can’t deliver a good experience.
I don’t want my frequent fliers to always long for the "exit row". When I’m complete this will be a trip of a lifetime.
These tickets are first class only; can you afford to ride? I’ve had enough passengers that bring about problems that can make a two-hour destination an everlasting miserable experience. If you want a bigger responsibility, then that means you have a larger scale to be measured on.
So now I ask... What are you doing to merge with my airline? You have to have a 5 star personality to co-captain this ship. I’m in training to get my wings, but when it’s time to soar the skies, I need you to be ready to help anchor. I’m quite capable of doing it alone, but if I dose off... who will get the wheel?
I need someone I can trust with my life, that I know will be fit enough to coincide with this journey. The vision is my own, but if you’re headed in my direction we can cut our expenses if we choose to ride together. As inflation takes off and the prices go up, so do my expectations. You get what you pay for, and for every expensive experience it needs to be cost-effective. So the real question is... Are you worth my investment?
I can’t invest in damaged goods. You can’t gleam on the outside but have a tarnished interior when I open that door. I’d rather take a flight in a DC-10 with a few common dents, or in need of a new paint job if the soul of its engine is fine-tuned to withstand our journey. Just because you look good on the outside doesn’t mean your course is set to follow mine. I know how to deviate; I won’t follow anyone towards destruction.
Right now I’m resting in the mechanic’s hanger. Preparing myself for that journey. No fleet has to fly alone. If you think you’re equipped to enter my radar, I suggest that you be worth entering my radius. As I stated prior, this airline has no place for unattended or overweight bags. Anyone who chooses to break these rules will be immediately asked to exit the cabin. Thanks.
© A. L. Lewis
Sunday, April 6, 2008
Release
The purpose of this page... To increase the light by releasing it's darkness. Thank you to those who allow me to shed my excess baggage by indulging in the idea that none of us are perfect and we all have problems. I'm not choosing to run from them anymore! Although I swear I know everything, my past denotes that there's room for growth. By declaring my vulnerabilities it creates a more able plain to rest on. So no, Im not perfect, but yes, I'm still flyy! CHEA!!!!
With Love, Alaina
© A. L. Lewis
Bittersweet
I’m not bitter… I’m like an eclipse. I just haven’t lost my moon.
I’m not trying to be bittersweet, but then again I’m done trying… I’ve stood in the blocks ready to run the race many times but I never took home the prize. No matter how swift my feet were, or how far they carried me, I never got further than “no”. I’ve met a dozen “NO” men, but where’s my “YES” man who equals out my equation. A “punctuation” at the end of my sentence that can turn my question mark into an absolute exclamation point.
I’ve been through enough. Damage builds character but it also changes my perception. I can’t see as clear as I used to, but even with spectacles every man still looks the same. Trouble. In truth my vision is far from the problem, it’s the lack of focal points of importance that stays my directive. Where are the men worth seeing because I’m tired of gazing upon “problems”. My eyes have seen enough of those, and that’s why they’re shielded by the rising of my moon.
On the brighter side of things, I’m at peace. As long as I continue to be the dawn of my own happiness my sun will never set to another falling star. All those that approach me, can still see my rays, but will have to travel a far distance to experience its heat.
But in my darkest days there’s no trust for anyone. I patiently anticipate pain. I wait with an eagerness for men to fail my heart and continue adding to the trail of my tears. As each hour grows darker the hope of a promising experience fades further into the backdrop of my life. Where are the soldiers of fortune to whom will polish my tarnished faith in man and brighten the wake of my night? My hope in a perfect love has almost diminished.
So here I sit. Not waiting, but rather lounging in my contentment until the day comes when my two halves find reason to become whole again.
© A.L. Lewis
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Serenity
"A general peace and serenity newly succeeded a general trouble." Sir W. Temple
Definition: Serenity 1: a disposition free from stress or emotion
2:the absence of mental stress or anxiety
Quest: To reach a long lasting state of serenity to bring a peace to my external and internal being as I continue to press forward towards completion.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Lethal Doses
One hit can be deadly . . . Some people carry so much toxic energy that to fuse yourself with their spirit can leave you terminal. Negativity has a radiating pulse, and too much of it can stop the beat of your own. Checking in for a visit can have you checking out from the morgue.
The funny thing about any bad addiction is the shadow of reality it masks to your eyes. You think you need it, at times it feels good, but the aftershock always leaves you depleted with self.
My addictions have always had first and last names. It was always easier for me to latch on to people rather than a substance. Like any other drug, with every first encounter it was amazing. My problem was always exiting when the time was right and I could no longer feel the same high.
I somehow find myself addicted to “Science Projects” and unhealthy relationships. “Science Projects”, are people who are lacking some major functioning necessities due to their own lethal doses of negative life experiences. Because I am wired to care for others I attract these individuals like Dr. Moreau. It’s like bringing home a stray dog. You should never be surprised when you get bit.
The heart of me wants to be their rock, but the energy from them hollows me out. My solids turn to dust and soon after I’m blowing in the wind trying to gather the fragments of me so I can become whole again. These unhealthy relationships whether it is a boyfriend, a girlfriend, friendships, or a potential suitor can do more harm then good. I know I’m not the only one who has over stayed their welcome in home they knew was falling down.
I’m learning to cut ties… I’m done trying to understand, be a hero, be a permanent stepping stone, or an absorbent of their poison. I’d rather be a traffic cop and direct them to the door. I’ve recently removed the I.V. from a few individuals in my life. I encourage them if they are reading this to clean up their issues before they replant their “drip” in my veins. As I’ve told my readers before, I’m making changes, and some of them may be you… (…you know who you are).
© A.L. Lewis
The funny thing about any bad addiction is the shadow of reality it masks to your eyes. You think you need it, at times it feels good, but the aftershock always leaves you depleted with self.
My addictions have always had first and last names. It was always easier for me to latch on to people rather than a substance. Like any other drug, with every first encounter it was amazing. My problem was always exiting when the time was right and I could no longer feel the same high.
I somehow find myself addicted to “Science Projects” and unhealthy relationships. “Science Projects”, are people who are lacking some major functioning necessities due to their own lethal doses of negative life experiences. Because I am wired to care for others I attract these individuals like Dr. Moreau. It’s like bringing home a stray dog. You should never be surprised when you get bit.
The heart of me wants to be their rock, but the energy from them hollows me out. My solids turn to dust and soon after I’m blowing in the wind trying to gather the fragments of me so I can become whole again. These unhealthy relationships whether it is a boyfriend, a girlfriend, friendships, or a potential suitor can do more harm then good. I know I’m not the only one who has over stayed their welcome in home they knew was falling down.
I’m learning to cut ties… I’m done trying to understand, be a hero, be a permanent stepping stone, or an absorbent of their poison. I’d rather be a traffic cop and direct them to the door. I’ve recently removed the I.V. from a few individuals in my life. I encourage them if they are reading this to clean up their issues before they replant their “drip” in my veins. As I’ve told my readers before, I’m making changes, and some of them may be you… (…you know who you are).
© A.L. Lewis
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
The Uprising!
Everyone starts at the bottom ‘til they make their mark and get past middle ground. I’ve always gotten to the middle, but I never made it to the top. I usually get sidetracked or disinterested in the struggle because lets face it, you have to crawl before you walk and I’m tired of brushing off my knees. LOL. I realize at 28, that everything I want in life is only “thoughts” away. My mind is what stops me and is the only thing that halts my ventures. It’s time to retrain my thinking and make my mind work for me. Success is different to each individual and it comes at different levels of your life. I find when I don’t attempt to master each step in the proper order, when I get to where I believe I want to be, those unresolved issues from the past make their presence a factor in my imperfect world.
My first order of business is to be successful at being me. Does that make sense?
How many of us look at what another individual has and wishes or envies their attributes upon ourselves. Who even knows the road they took or the sacrifices they made to attain their “successes”. You should never look at what others have or who others are, and want to fill their shoes. If anything let it inspire you to change. I intend to be complete in my size 12’s. It’s time to work on being happy with my imperfections and resolved in the things of my past that restructured the road to my future.
So today I state, “No more compromises.” To complete my first mission, I must complete me. There’s only one road to take and it has no off ramps. I’ll see you on the other side.
© A.L. Lewis
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